5/17/05

I very much miss the world. (My plans for leaving the ones I love.)

I will be well, soon enough. and with that, will do my damndest to make the most out of my summertime and fall.

Work, lots of it. Assuredly, little to none of it paid. (I will live, close to the bone. doing what I have to, to get done what needs to be. Jobs and stability of any kind have been fucking up my motivation near constantly since Ive returned to America since my last good 4 month fuck off. this is going to be my time to get my shit together.)

I will hammer out the last of the start of graduate school applications. In that full time situation, I will be fucking throwing a few heavy and horrible anchors to new york at institutions for film.
Its just the only thing thats gonna happen.
With the weight and inarguability that will come with this commitment, I can be free to fuck off good and hard to another land. The sooner its done, the sooner I'm gone.

god for fucking shit's sake, this is going to be a lot of work.

I will try my hand at being a loving vulgar memory by December. With expensive and frivolous plans for hawaii cementing my January. Its good to live high with friends for a temporary lapse of judgement.

All in all. its time to get my unholy shit together.
It feels damn fine to have plans of some kind.
(I fucked my May Day plans especially hard this year for little to no reason. I live spontaneusly when I travel. If I pick a place, and dont entirely take it seriously, and dont buy tickets that day.... Its gonna be put off at least a year. This Time I pick nothing, I'll just leave. I'm already excited to come back. I miss my friends. I'm so excited to miss them.)

(I should be good and gone, from late January to Mid May.)(around this time, season heats up and I'm back.) (I'll then swing through the city for a time, and fuck off good and hard for another month or so.) (then... dedicate the shit out of myself to schooling.) ( A damn fine plan.)
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