I HAVE A MOTHERFUCKING JOB AND ITS A BITCH TO POST PICS WITH A VERY PRETTY BUT IDIOTIC MAC LAPTOP. MY ROYALE WITH CHEESE IS WORTHLESS. SO......
IT'S STORY TIME AGAIN!
THE LAST TIME I DID THIS I ALMOST LOST MY GIRLFRIEND... AWW FUCK IT. I'M GONNA ROCK THE VERY HAPPY BOAT AND STUPIDLY DEFY CHRIST WITH STORYTIME UNTIL DISASTER STRIKES AGAIN.
SO... WHAT KIND OF STORY WOULD YOU LIKE TODAY?
(sorry, no prostitute stories. that road is fucking CLOSED.)
I HAVE THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT TODAY...
1. A MURDER THAT I WAS INVOLVED IN. (jesus i'm really letting the monkeys loose with that one. you know what? just forget this option.)
2. THE GUN THAT WAS PUT IN MY FACE IN BROOKLYN THAT WAS COMPLETELY MY FAULT. (thanks drugs, you make my mistakes seem almost effortless.)
3. MY BUDDY JIM, THE 52 YEAR OLD DRUG ADDICT/TATTO ARTIST WHO BOUGHT 90% OF THE PILLS I SOLD THE SUMMER OF MY 16TH YEAR ON EARTH. WHO ALSO TAUGHT ME THE FINE ART OF CLUMSILY BREAKING INTO CARS AND FENCING CAR AUDIO EQUIPMENT. (there is more to the story but not much more. this might not be the longest story.)
4. BRENT GRAB BAG. (the guy is just great. he put my life in danger more than anyone else I've ever met and taught me what the word loyalty meant.) (that is when he didnt try to get high with/bang the shit out of my long term girlfriend when I was 15. I forget nothing you monster. but i still love you, we were kids and you've made it up to me more times than i can remember.)
5. YOU PICK A TOPIC, TELL A LITTLE STORY YOU HAVE ABOUT SAID TOPIC AND I'LL SEE IF I CAN BEAT IT. (its a challenge. step on up)
(as soon as i get three votes, i start writing.)
THE LAST TIME I DID THIS I ALMOST LOST MY GIRLFRIEND... AWW FUCK IT. I'M GONNA ROCK THE VERY HAPPY BOAT AND STUPIDLY DEFY CHRIST WITH STORYTIME UNTIL DISASTER STRIKES AGAIN.
SO... WHAT KIND OF STORY WOULD YOU LIKE TODAY?
(sorry, no prostitute stories. that road is fucking CLOSED.)
I HAVE THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT TODAY...
1. A MURDER THAT I WAS INVOLVED IN. (jesus i'm really letting the monkeys loose with that one. you know what? just forget this option.)
2. THE GUN THAT WAS PUT IN MY FACE IN BROOKLYN THAT WAS COMPLETELY MY FAULT. (thanks drugs, you make my mistakes seem almost effortless.)
3. MY BUDDY JIM, THE 52 YEAR OLD DRUG ADDICT/TATTO ARTIST WHO BOUGHT 90% OF THE PILLS I SOLD THE SUMMER OF MY 16TH YEAR ON EARTH. WHO ALSO TAUGHT ME THE FINE ART OF CLUMSILY BREAKING INTO CARS AND FENCING CAR AUDIO EQUIPMENT. (there is more to the story but not much more. this might not be the longest story.)
4. BRENT GRAB BAG. (the guy is just great. he put my life in danger more than anyone else I've ever met and taught me what the word loyalty meant.) (that is when he didnt try to get high with/bang the shit out of my long term girlfriend when I was 15. I forget nothing you monster. but i still love you, we were kids and you've made it up to me more times than i can remember.)
5. YOU PICK A TOPIC, TELL A LITTLE STORY YOU HAVE ABOUT SAID TOPIC AND I'LL SEE IF I CAN BEAT IT. (its a challenge. step on up)
(as soon as i get three votes, i start writing.)
posted by zipco at 9/26/2005 11:27:00 AM
13 Comments:
made up? like hell its made up.
but not to worry, your taunting will have no effect. I'm still not going to put photos online that could chuck me in jail as other threats to my journalistic rights have shown me recently.
but lordy, do i ever apreciate the faith.
renata, I'm just happy to hear from you. its nice that you keep reading through my occasional lazy hiatus.
i like 3 and 4.
i like any that don't invovle you enabling/condoning/innocent bystanding around violence against women.
really.
okay so that last post wasn't really english. sorry.
i was just saying that any post that doesn't involve violence against women and your role in promoting it in any way is pretty much better than terrible and won't get your ass evicted.
yawn
missus!!!!!
murder story
murder story
I vote for option 1
let's hear it
I vote 2. I've heard a shortened version of it, but I'd like some detail...
yeah forget the murder story, fuck that. oops. stupid idea.
tara i dont like the murder story either.
its gonna be a story about brent i figure.
that guy is great.
and that picture of the fat girl is from georgia. not the nyc.
by the by, who is MONKEYWRENCH?
You know what story I want to hear? That one about the knocked up lady knocking back the Jack Daniels.
that one's really a mini-story if you will. she boozed, she winked, she went inside. zip--tell it good, but don't use that as your choice. let that be a pre-amble or a digression.
i'm curious as to why stories that are real (they are real, right?) about violence against women can get you "evicted"... but the fact that they ARE real and they did happen and that you did participate in them doesn't matter unless you relate the story here. it's not what you do, it's who you tell (or something)?
oh and i vote for #2. murder can often be less entertaining than we think.
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